I just watched a youtube video on my computer about a Fire Lookout somewhere in the USA's Cascades. The video felt somewhat special. Not only were the amazing videography and composition absolutely cinnematic, they were emotionally moving. It awakened a long-lost emotion in me: longing.
This feeling, this longing for something. Something quiet. Something truly beautiful. Something unique but also the longing for something new, maybe unknown. It doesn't have to be real.
I believe that every person has felt this feeling at some point. Whether it is a longing for a person, an object, a place, something abstract, perhaps just a thought. It doesn't matter at all. Everyone has felt it before. Right now, I long for another life. A calmer, slower life. A life, where I don't go to be at 23:30 and wake up at 5:50. A life where I get up at 7:00 after eight hours of sleep and take a walk in nature, or, on a rainy day, drink tea and look out the window while listening to a Radiohead record. (Of course, it could be any other record, but I just listened to "All I Need" and I think it's such a beautiful song.)
I also wonder if I'll ever live this dream, and when I do if I'll even still want to. Whether I'll live it with someone, or whether I'll be alone.
I wonder, where I will live it. Somewhere in the Cascades like the guy in the video? Or rather in a lighthouse somewhere in the (ant-)arctic region? Maybe in a remote village in rural Japan? I dont' know.
I wonder what I would do the entire day. Reaing books about mathematics, draw or sketch, make or write music, ..., maybe something more practical? Will I tell the person I love tell about this dream?
I can feel the longing in my heart
